Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Infected Mushroom

It has been another busy week, made more difficult by the lack of a car. Unfortunately at first the garage was too busy too look at it, then since they did they are having difficulty locating a part. I feel really guilty taking so many lifts, my Mum has even been taking the bus to work so I can get to work. Thanks to the dire state of public transportation it is actually easier for my mum to catch a bus to Withington than for me to Wilmslow. There is a bus which runs from the end of my road into Manchester (passing through Withington and Didsbury on route). I would have to catch two buses and it would take longer for me to go a much shorter distance. I still feel guilty though even though she offered, my parents will do pretty much anything for me which is great but also makes me feel like a child, I can never be independent while I am here. Ill always be an ungrateful and underachieving person until I get some more independence into my life, get out of the comfort zone as they say.
Talking of comfort zones, last night I was just drifting off to sleep when the earthquake woke me. For some strange reason it made me think of the night I went out with Martina and the French assistants; I don't really know why my brain made the association, but it did. One think struck me, something I have realised meeting them and other people recently, I'm not a tactile person at all. The French girl did the European lets kiss as we great thing and I really found it very awkward. I have never felt comfortable at close quarters with people, it just wasn't part of my upbringing. I always feel awkward and flustered, I think it makes me appear standoffish and aloof, which isn't the case at all. I actually really like hugs, I just lack the confidence around people that I don't know well.

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