Who is Tyler Durden?

I felt fine after drinking last night, I guess that Harp extra must be actually quiet light. It was a funny night just a few relaxed drinks and some chatting at the John Millington. Nice and stress free.

Nick was on at me to come to the V festival, and I must confess I would really like to their are some amazing bands playing. Unfortunately im already in the red after Turkey, what with all the trips there and the fact I had barley paid off China. Then no sooner did I reach home but I had to buy some new glasses. They came to over £300 after the lenses and sight test, so at least for a few months I need to be careful.

I had a free day today with nothing much to do. I decided to relax in the morning then went for a swim. I stupidly cycled there thinking a few minutes of sunshine meant better weather. Haha, I should have remembered the sunshine is just a trap to make you forget your coat. On the way home I was as wet as I had been in the pool!

This afternoon after watching Hamilton come third in a slightly anticlimatic Silverstone, I tried to get something done on my Dad's website. I proved impossible, I think I will have to either rewrite it or use a Windows server to host it, because try as I might I cannot get mono to run this webpage :(

I got a text message from Olya, apparently its raining on the black sea and today is some sort of valentines day affair in Russia. I wasn't entirely sure how to respond. I cant quiet work out if she is tormenting me, wants to be friends, is just bored, or actually misses me. I should really stop tormenting myself and forget about her. One of my friends told me my problem is that I form too deep connections too quickly with people so I get hurt. I think she is correct, and maybe I find it hard to deal with so hide myself away. Mostly I think I analyse too much and act too little. I just need to try and be more assertive, challenge myself and try and be a little less introvert.

This evening I headed to Phil's house to play on his Wii, he has bought another nun chuck so we were able to have two player boxing. So much fun, and actually a little workout. Next was gold then tennis. I actually managed to win at tennis usually I get thrashed :) The Wii is really a fun toy, really engaging and a lot more enjoyable than I imagined. I kind of really want one, though I am not sure how much I would use it after the novelty wore off.

I hope this post isn't too boring / rambling. I have found blogging really difficult recently, I feel pretty sad and am *trying* desperately not to totally lose it, and stay as positive as I can.

Save Me

I have done a lot today, I was in work for 6am to put some programs live. It all seemed to go very well which is about the best we can do.

I also went to the gym for the first time since before my holiday, I did some leg exercise. I have lost some strength but I just about managed a session. I felt a lot better for it afterwards.
This evening I went out with Nick, Bruce and Phil. It was a lot less harsh than last night. Rather than just complain about our love lives, we had fun, chatted about nothing and everything setting the world to rights.

Met Mark Dunnington at the pub, its amazing to me that this guy is married with a job as a policeman, and a house. I remember when he was a reprobate, it just shows how much things can and do change. He reminded us that Ian and Paul are going to Amsterdam with them for Emilie's fiancée stage do, should be fun for them!

I picked up my new glasses today (pictures below). My eyesight has changed a great deal since I last was tested so much one of my eyes basically wasn't working, crazy huh! They have pretty much bankrupted me as they were a rather unexpected expense. I got a card through the post and decided to follow it up. I last had a check in 2003! I shouldn't have left it so long my eyes have really changed, and work should really pay for the test as I work behind a screen.

I got some texted off Olya today she met and argued with her ex and was feeling not the best. It was great to hear from her but I was a little stuck on what to say, I just want her here with me now but it is impossible, so no point on dwelling on it.