Sunday, October 01, 2006

Have a cigar

I am listening to Pink Floyd whilst I do a few little bits to my site I have been meaning to do forever but never got around to. Firstly I have tried to move all the older photo galleries so everything is in coppermine rather than in the old web gen albums I used to use. Its incredibly tedious but it is weird to see some of the old photos I have my camera for 4 years now quiet weird I remember so vividly the excitment of buying it I have wnated one for so long. Now its old and I am usually slightly ashamed at how big and clunky it looks but regardless I have taken some great shots.

Last night I went round to Bergers house to play monopoly and drink beer. As usual I felt like I was being constantly analysed by Holly, I also feel that she draws far too many conclusion quickly. Yes I like games I get excited to win does that say a lot about me? I think not really competition is natural in a darwinian being such as we are does it say something deep about my soul I am sure you could drawn a lot of conclusion some true some not the trouble with people is dispite all we know we are unpredicatble things at the best of times.

I miss Maia terribly miss the ability to sit and chat for hours to feel totally at peace. Her ability to keep me completly abosrbed whilst she talked, I wonder constantly what would have happened if things had been different if I had gone out to see her sooner? Would I be like her Italian is to her now? Or did we get on so well because I didnt push a romantic connection. Of course its impossible to know and I can only drive myself insane with the questioning. I need to forget and move on stop chasing such impossible and idealised dreams.

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