Run to the Hills

Today was another day in paradise; the air conditioner is broken so we had to open the windows. This isn't an ideal situation when there is a busy road outside make it difficult to hear. Fortunately the smell of drains has dissipated, the air conditioner repair man says we need a new compressor so don't hold our breath waiting for a new one.

I spent another day trying to get my colleagues web service functional think I am finally there it still needs some error handling but at least it brings back figures now. It kind of annoyed me the way my colleague told myself (and everyone else) he was nearly done when in fact there was a lot of work to do. Mind you it has forced me to learn more and I think in the end it will be a good bit of code so I am staying positive.

At 4.45 and the IT boys got everyone off the system to fail over as the power was going down in our building. Power in the main building would still be operational. The switchover should have taken minutes, at 5.45 I left (15minutes late) for the failover hadn' taken place. Typical of technology really always goes wrong at the least opportune moment.

Japanese class was unbelievable the difficulty level has really ramped up. Eme was trying to teach us tenses using the days and dates we have learned over the last few weeks. It's really difficult a total departure from the way us English (and Europeans) treat grammar. They also have a fun way of shortening words, it's all very confusing I need to practise more.

I got home to find a message on my phone about work. Appaerently a controller card had failed on one of the servers which prevented fail over and they were having trouble getting services to restart. Luckly I rang back it seems that the problems had resolved and the servers will be online when I get in tomorrow. Thank goodness for that! Tomorrow is Mo's last day would be a shame not to be able to go out for lunch as planned because of a system failure.

Two comments in two days thats excellent going, lucky me. Hello Sarah, I do indeed I remember, you, very well in fact. Thanks for the feedback your most kind I only hope I can maintain your interest :) In fact Paul mentioned you and Simo in passing on the weekend.

Slam

I cut last night's post short due to the fact it was getting pretty late. Yesterday I spent the morning was spent with Paul. He played me a couple of his new songs which I enjoyed greatly. One of which was very good, almost a Thom Yorkesq dance track the other needed a bit of work but had potential. Its always great to hear Paul's songs I almost feel like I am part of the creative process feeding something back.

We played some more computer games, it's been years since I used a console system in anger it was quiet a lot of fun especially Mario kart. I remember the day I bought my Nintendo 64 with Mario 64 I think I stayed up most of the night playing!

I left about 7 and had a nightmare journey home I was going to go on the toll then realised I had no change so decided to go via Birmingham error! Lots of roadwork's complete with speed cameras very confusing and stressful at night and in the rain.

Work was a bit of a nightmare today not least because of the smell. Since the restaurant down stairs close apparently people have been clogging one of the sinks. It was full of rotting food and blocked up, a plumber cleared it but the stench was unbelievable. I also had to deal with a failure on one of the systems. I was supposed to dial in and fix tonight unfortunately my login has expired so I can't. I also got left a program which I was assure was nearly done just needed a bit of tweaking. Well I tweaked it all afternoon and it's still not working. It was productive day in that I managed to take out my frustrations at the gym rather than on people. I didn' managed to do any Japanese practise yet I will have to have a skim through at lunch tomorrow.

This evening Phil and Bruce came over and we watched episode three of Lost season three. I think that so far I have been unimpressed and this episode did nothing to rekindle my interest. Thanks to Becky for her comment, I always enjoy feedback. I still haven't found out who the anonymous person that claimed to have read the entire 2006 archive is any takers?

I felt truly rotten Saturday morning but I somehow managed to get up at 8 shower breakfast and get out by 9.20 I was on my way to Bristol. I arrived about 12.30 roadwork held me up through Birmingham but the M5 was a joy tore down it with happy abandon.

I managed to have a bit of a look round the city saw the Quay area which was very nice lots of fountains and outdoor art. I had lunch in a bar overlooking it all which was rather pleasant. I even went into the St Mary Redcliffe Church which was pretty spectacular. I think I need to do more of these trips travel around and see more of the United Kingdom I seem to know Australia better.

I didn't really fancy travelling all the way back I toyed with the Idea of staying down there however I had another idea popped into see Paul in Leamington its was a lot quicker than going all the way home. Even better I arrived in time to share Thai curry with him and Pippa. We stayed up and chatted about life played some games and watched the grudge (my advice don't bother and this was my second viewing). I played Mario Kart I had forgotten how much fun it is and how much I wanted to win (I think had Holly been there she would have been shocked at how competitive we all were).

Pippa went to bed earlier and Paul and I sat up chatting it was good to catch up we didn't really have the time to chat last week because there were so many of us out. Being at his little pad chilling out in control of things made me more determined than ever I must get my own place as much as I love my parents its doing me no good living here I rely on them and it makes me lazy and cowardly. Its also a real turn off to women they want strong independent types not mummies boys still living at home. If only I could raise that deposit!

El Condor Pasa

I have been away from my PC this weekend so apologies for the lack of posting. Ill start with Friday night and try and work chronologically forward.

Mo (the girl I work with) had her last day next Wednesday so we decided to go have a few drinks after work. There was a small irony in this as being a Muslim she dosn't drink and was fasting so couldn't even drink her coke until after Sundown at 6.08. It was actually quiet pleasant the other people from work were relaxed. After 3 pints I was a little sozzelled, Mo left and there was another group going into Manchester, I decided not to as I wanted a quiet night because of my trip to Bristol on the Saturday.

My dad was kind enough to give me a lift home, so I had some dinner and got changed sobered up. Phil called me and asked if I fancied going for a quick drink at the Rectory I said hell why not so we headed back to Wilmslow. Arriving at the Rectory to find it busy and not on top form. We had a pint and were about to leave when we bumped into Endo and his mate. Somehow things got a little hazy from here more drinks followed then more we headed to the Sam Finny more drinks followed before I knew it I was wasted making a fool of myself on the dancefloor.

Flawless

Went for a drink after work to celebrate (not sure if that is the correct term) Mo's leaving. Was a reasonable nice couple of drinks with the co workers my dad was kind enought to give me a lift home. I stayed too late though and missed out going to see a band with Jo.

My parents took the cat to the vet found out that he has an ear infection and need antibiotics. The vet did say that for such an old cat he had a really nice coat. He is asleep on my bed at the moment, poor old thing.

Yuk

My cat woke me up in the night by throwing up. Its been ill for several years with failing kidneys we take it to the vet every 6 weeks or so for a steroid injection. It is lso on a low protein diet personally I think its amazing he is still alive 19 years old has got to be a great ago for a cat.

However beeing woken up by the sound of him hacking up on my floor at 4.30am wasnt the most fun I have had this week. Fortunatly most of it landed on my British Computer Society voting forms rather than the carpet.

Yay

To help cheer myself up I have arranged to go to see Paul on the weekend. Hurrah it's always fun times with him. What with going out for Mo's leaving do tomorrow its going to be a hectic one not managed much Japanese practise yet :S

Oh Andy has come online going to help sort out his email night all.

All the things she said

Sorry for the lack of posts recently but there have been a few things at work and home that I could not publish but if I had started a blog these thoughts would have ended up on there. Things have calmed down enough for me to blog again without ending up in trouble I hope.

It's Maia' birthday today she text messaged me this morning to say the card I sent her had arrived amazing timing really, I wish I could claim I planned it to perfection it was really just luck with the post, I hope she has a good time. I don't know if its the end of the line for us I can feel we are drifting apart that bond we had whilst I was over there and talking to her on the phone her gone. She has the Italian for that now. I shall really miss the fact that someone out there needed only to hear my voice to be happy.

Work has not been good recently I have been feeling really frustrated with myself and some of the people I work with. I just feel like there is no progression for me I am simply doing the same old things everyday, I need to be improving myself rather than stagnating. In truth I am not sure what to do should I tell my boss I am unhappy with the way things are, carry on waiting for the next review starting looking for something else or start doing some courses, I am so confused!

Jono came over this evening inturupting a msn chat I was having with his sister Ali. She wants me to read some new age books about motivation and postive mental attitude. I am pretty dead set against to be honest I gave up goign too church I don' need any other qusi religion in my life. Jono then tempted me back to his place for tea and toast. I was meant to be going for a drink with Phil but he never turned up.

Fixed Mac

Another boring day of work but thanks to good feeling from the weekend I managed to get through.
Tonight I popped to the gym realising I have been very lazy and put on a few pounds and lost a bit of fitness did a 6KM run and 15 minutes of the bikes it nearly killed me but I got through.
Phil came round to help me fix my mac following a guide managed to swap out the hard disk. It was a pain needed to ask Jono as I didn't have a small enough jewlers screwdriver. I stupidly tried using a stanley knife after gonig through two blades I reliased I had to call round for help.
Have been listening to Slam by Pendulum thanks to Wooler playing it intensivly this weekend. Itunes is great sometime, mind you the album costs 9.95 on itunes but you can buy the CD for 7.99 from HMV online.

The Departed

After getting back from Andy's I spent the afternoon reading finished off Wizard and Glasss I think its the worst one of the dark tower series so far though it does provide a lot of depth to Roland's character
Went to see the Departed tonight with Phil, its a pretty good thought completly butal film. It was a typical mob film given an Irish twist set in Boston the action follows Boston Irish kingpin Frank Costello he has his fingers in every pie including the police force. Against this raw recruit Billy Costigan a kid with a family history tied up with the mob play goes undercover to get to inside Costellos organisation. PLenty of twist and turns follow. The action is brutal it reminded me of the gritty reality of a history of violence. It is well filmed and acted, definatly worth a watch as long as you like dark ganster films and can stand the slow pace and length (about 2.5 hours).

Trains to Brazil

Paul had come up from Leamington for the weekend and was staying with Woller. So last night I went out "with the boys" in Macclesfield. Jo Berger Riginhi also came out with us though they left earlier.

Everybody was in high spirits and after a few games or Mario Cart we stomped down to the Flowerpot for a warm up drinks. Jokes were told beer was drunk then another walk into the town.

Next stop was Weatherspoons more banter jokes and oggling on the local talent followed. I wish I could remember the jokes but mostly I just remember laughing a lot. I do remember that the bar was stupidly busy so we were forced to double up our drinks.

Leaving the Weatherpoons several pints heavier but one member lighter Righni had to catch a train, we stoped for a quick drink in a couple of places before taking the plunge and heading to Chicago Rock. Not my favoirte venue but hey after a few drinks and with a brillent £10 for entrie and 7 count them drinks it was fun. I even had a bit of a dance.

Grabbed a kebab and ended up back at wollers. On the way into his hous ehe managed to set the alarm off then put his music on full blast I am sure his neighbours wanted to listen to pendulum at 3 am.

I managed to be drunk enough to wack hell out of Wollers punch bag I have no idea why it seemed like a fun thing to do at the time.

Dungens and dragons

These are interesting times for sure, I haven't seen Phil all week since the Birmingham job he seemed very happy got something else line up.
Today was a nightmare for me thanks for someone leaving I got moved to another desk overlooked by the entire department coupled with a micro managing boss I don't thing I will last long.

I have spent the day doing the most boring task editing an excel document documenting fields there's are well over 2000 of them each taking a minute of so, it going to take a long time. Did I really study for a degree to edit excel spending my life doing the least meaningful tasks?

Tonight chatted to miss ??? reviled far too much as is my nature I am sure I will have scared her away despite her thoughts to the contrary.

I found myself at the unicorn Claire was there she looked fatter and less appealing than ever compared to Maia she was nothing I wonder if I will feel this way about Maia? Is this moving on? Why did it take so long did I not want to?

A weird episode happened to us this evening on arrival we [Phil and I] were sat near to a group of loud people. Eventually one guy came over to talk about the nature of existence and a girl came over to tell Phil he is a wizard and need to be open minded. It was weird hearing Phil drawn into thing I hope I am not that malleable, Personally I find any religion ever Wicca to be counter to my view but it sure sparked some debate.

I can't get Maia out of my head its the question that haunts me "would things have been different if I met her first?" its an insane track of though pointless and meaningless its happened I just need to deal with it and move on but somehow its impossible. I want her so much how was it I kept quiet why I hide my feelings am I a coward or a hero?

I know miss ??? thinks I am a loser did I damn myself twice? With the same words?

It must be nice to believe in something it's been a long time since I have had any touchstone,

Go Back

One of the people I have worked with since day one handed in her notice today. It won't be the same without her there will be no-one to make the tea for starters! No seriously she has been a pleasure to work with it will leave a big gap in the office space; I hope her new employ will work out best of luck.

My day went alright got a massive and tedious data mapping exercise to do. Also been working on a new print routine means less work for people I didn't ask what would happen to the people that had been doing the work. I find that it is better not to ask. After all I did not make the choice nor could I change it.

Tonight I stayed in I have been trying to save some money I have another holiday (any ideas where to go?) coming up and I haven't paid off the last one yet!

It was quiet nice to relax to be honest sitting reading with the cat sat on my lap, chatting to a few people on the net build up my strength for a raucous time in Macclesfield this weekend. Paul is coming up and staying with Matt Woller so Macc is the place to party.

Rock on!

Big Brother

I think I managed to scare Paul today. He happened to be looking at my photo gallery at the same time I was checking the stat pages. I texted him and asked whether he had enjoyed the photos. An immediate text back reviled his surprise. Before you all shutdown and never return I cant actually find out who is viewing the site only make educated guesses I can see the host the ISP and the geographic location (I put a link in however it was broken if you want to see the map click here and select show visitor map). I can think of only one person in the Midland's who would spend hours looking through my website. From what I can see there are two or three Londoner's I guess that is probably Emily, Pippa and Another but who knows.

Talking of Paul he turned me onto the Easy All Stars Reggae version of OK Computer I heard one song then bought the album and I am not disappointed so chilled and well done completely respectful to the original concept yet sounds fresh and new, excellent!

Work was actually quiet civil for a change looks like we might actually get something live this century, in fact the only annoyance was from someone through email badgering me. I do wish he would concentrate on his own work instead of mithering me.

Big in Japan

Today I managed to get something Live hurrah, only a small prog but at least I am finally managing to get some changes through the system. I even did accompanying the paperwork. I there is something good about actually solving a problem even if noone pats me on the back I still get a sense of achievement.

Afterwork I had my third (actually the fifth thanks to the lessons I missed whilst I was in Belarus). Today we practised some more Katakana a few of the symbols are starting to come to me but its only the tip of the iceberg this is in the main the anglified version (with some German French and other lanagues thrown in for fun). Also learned the days of the week oh and I am looking for a Kana keyboard anyone know where I can buy one?

Tonight wathced Clerks II it was pretty funny nowhere as near as biting social commentary as the first movie I especially missed the little customers asides from the first movie. I also felt some of Hicks rants were a little over done, however its was a funny movie well worht a watch as long as you don't mind swearing or sexual themes ;)

I feel a bit more chilled out today perhaps it was the success at work perhaps I am just having a good day this evening I feel better in my mind than I have done in a long time. Had a few people message me randomly from myspace and ICQ recently a few even seem like nice people which is always nice perhaps I am due for an upturn in fortunes, well I can hope right ;)

There is nothing like emptying a cartrige at the sun!

Several worring things from Netdoctor. I took some of the quizzes apparently I am depressed and possibliy an alcoholic, no surpirses there then. Worse though is the fact I should have had vaccinations before going to Belarus I didn't though. Hopefully I am fine on symptoms other than this never ending cold but I had that before I left.
I am sure I will survive its one of the things I seem to be good at so far. Someone asked me about the titles of the posts where it was some clever joke, unfortunatly not there is nothing very deep about it. I found I wasn't very imaginative about title so I started to choose the title or lyrics of a sing I am listening to whilst writing it, for example this post has a lyric from Regina Spektor Uhmerica. Most are pretty obvious but some are quiet obscure.

Right I am going to read the last chapter of the waste lands beofre I sleep, night night.

Happy reading!

I want more

I can't stop thinking about Maia see her in my dreams, she's always on my mind hiding in corners seeing false images memories intruding into my mind whilst I run round the track. How long will these feelings last how much can I stand. Rationally nothing ever happened never will but somehow the idea the dream if you will just wont fade at least not yet. I guess whats perverse is that I cant even talk to her about my feelings I made the choice and I have to live with it.

Meanwhile normal life continues, went to work today my boss made an appearance. He had meetings the client all morning. After lunch I chauffeured him to the new office. Its a pretty nice modern building was random to walk in and see M C and my dad sat in an office together. After a bit of a chat I gave Martin a lift back to the Airport and headed back to the clients. I heard more promises of a change to other more exciting projects but after what happened last time I think I will reserve judgement for the time being. Managed (I think to get one bug fixed) then it was home time.

Went to the gym in the hope that exercise would help rid some of my daemons, it worked a little I feel better for going though I am terribly unfit 5KM on the track nearly finished me off I'm sure I used to be able to do it faster and do a weights session afterwards. After the run I spent 25 minutes on the X-trainer then did some abdominals work I was covered in sweat and thoroughly exhausted by the time I hit the shower. I now weigh 83kg 5kg less though I fear that might in the most part be loss of muscle mass rather than fat. I think I need to get back into the weights.

How to replace a hard drive

Found out how to swap out the hard disk on my powerbook. Looks difficult but I might give it a try after the gym tonight.

Good Times Bad Times

Lulu received the card / present I sent her finally, I don't think she was impressed by the Russian doll. In fact she had no idea it was a popular Russian symbol however she was as ever most polite, think the card went down better she didn't even criticize my poor attempts at Chinese symbols. I must have practised 10 times before I wrote out the card but I still found it impossible.

Got a small moral dilemma, I have kept in touch with Paul's ex Lisa and she invited me to a party in London. I spoke to Paul about it and he was completely cool. Typically though I still some reservations fortunately I think Phil is going to come with me which should make everything cool as even if it turns out I don't have anything in common with anyone (a frequent fear of mine). Should be a fun trip out get the train there have a few drinks meet some new people catch up with Lisa, we had some fun times out in Australia so I have a good feeling. There was one spectre of a problem though on seeing a link to my blog she had a similar reaction to a girl I was kind of seeing some time back, P took one look on my blog had a total rant about how could I put my feelings online to the world I am a weirdo and I never heard from her again. Anne wasn't quiet as bad she simple said "I advise you not to".

Spent most of today chilling out I felt incredibly tired finished reading "The Waste Lands" It was a pretty good read King is a master of misdirection keeps you interested in the whys and wherefores.

Managed to make it to the gym for cardio session I found it incredibly hard to get there and harder still to make it through an hour of cardio but by the end as usual I felt much the better for it.

Spent some time today speaking to another Belarusian girl. Her name is Anna and she is currently on work experience in Bristol from her studies in Berlin. Se was most incensed I referred to a Russian village and not Belarusian one. So I went through and made some amendments. She did sent me some wonderful pictures of her home town and tell me a few more stories which was really nice. ICQ can be a wonderful medium sometimes.

Talking of why caught the first episode of the third of Lost, arghh nothing answered just more questions and only 3 characters its going to be another long but enjoyable series.

This evening watched a film Thank you for not smoking which a truly brilliant film dark funny and original. Well worth a watch whether you're a smoker or not it puts a different perspective on the debates. Part of the film is about the character that is the face for big tobacco Nick, he is an unashamed capitalist.

Out of Routine

I was a bit unhappy tired and drunk the other night, I contemplated deleting the post but given that statcounter shows quiet a few people have already read it I might as well it. To be honest some of the sentiment is true I spent six months cultivating an insane relationship with a girl in another country only to have it fail. I guess I should take away the good times I have had and move on try to find happiness closer to home.

I feel exhausted this morning building the internet cafe was a lot harder than we imagined. A series of last minute problems meant that although by 2 O'Clock we thought we were nearly finished, we didn't actually leave the ICC until 8:30pm. Then went for a curry courtesy of Jim then Bruce drove back to Manchester arrived about 12:30 I felt very tired went to bed.